I’ve been having a hard time sleeping lately; the holidays do a pretty good job of wringing out my heart and sending my mind out on painful trips down memory lane, and I just can’t stop thinking enough to sleep. Sometimes reading helps, and last tonight, while browsing through the news on Google, I came across this article about two exceptionally healthy and thriving micro-preemies.
9.9 ounce baby madiline mann, now a college student |
Born even smaller than our little peanut, the two girls featured in the article are a true testament to how strong we (humans) truly are, how far technology has come, and how early life truly begins. “One is a healthy first-grader, the other an honors college student majoring in psychology. Once the tiniest babies ever born, both girls are thriving, despite long odds when they entered the world weighing less than a pound.”
Their survival and the survival of preemies everywhere are proof that prayers are answered, and that life is so valuable. They are a reminder not to take our children for granted because so many have lost theirs.
One of the hardest days for me in the NICU was when one of the babies in Nixon’s pod didn’t make it. I was there when the doctors turned off the little guy's machines and I will never forget his mother’s cries. She just kept saying “I’m so sorry” over and over and over, trying to beg forgiveness from the baby that her own body forced her to give up 15 weeks too soon. I cried with her, as silently as I could, behind the curtain that separated her from where I sat holding Nixon. For hours she cried and apologized. I was face to face with my worst nightmare, and with my own guilt, and all I could do was hold my baby and cry and beg God not to take her because I couldn’t possibly live my life without her.
Adam holding Nixon's hand 3 days after she was born |
So, reading this article a little less than a year after we brought our daughter home from the NICU, I think maybe I’ve been focusing too much on the bad in my life and not enough on our blessings.
Thank you God for blessing us with a beautiful, healthy and perfect daughter. We are truly grateful for her, and for all of the other miracle micro-preemies you’ve delivered out of NICUs around the world.
xoxoxox that made me teary!
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